A Football Mash-Up


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keaneviera

Have you ever been to one of those all-you-can-eat buffet restaurants? Those places where they serve everything from deviled eggs to Swedish meatballs to Jello salad? And you only get one plate, so you take your one plate and just load up a mess of completely unrelated dishes until they all blend together in one big pile of food. That’s what today’s news review is: One big buffet pile of random news and strange information. Dig in and enjoy.

In case you haven’t heard, Roy Keane is the new manager of Ipswich Town. Football’s most famous dog walker wasted no time laying out his plans for the club and laying into former teammates. He isn’t too fond of former Republic of Ireland teammate Tony Cascarino in particular.

Yesterday Frank Lampard’s baby mama Elen Rives sounded off on the fat boy, calling him a ‘heartless bastard.’ Well today, Frank got to give his side of the story on BBC Radio. Good to see they’re keeping their break-up private.

In the latest round of Fergie vs. ‘Facts’, Sir Alex responds to Benitez’ claim that he has the better team. Of course if the rumor that Liverpool are in the hunt to sign Carlos Tevez (United’s forgotten man this season) is true, you have to wonder if ‘Facts’ really believes he has the better team.  I’m sure we’ll get our answer at a press conference in a few hours time.

In lighter news, much much lighter news, Rio Ferdinand has become friends with Michael Jackson. Apparently The Strange One called to congratulate Rio on his new website. Maybe it was Rio’s choice of cover girl that piqued Jacko’s interest. Could that mean Michael’s over the little boys and actually likes women? OK, quit laughing now.

I’ve got another joke for you. Actually it’s just a new quote from Arsenal’s Nicklas Bendtner. The misfiring Dane is ready to take over for the injured Robin van Persie and show his quality. I’ll give you a minute to wipe your eyes.

He should be more like Ryan Babel. After doing nothing at Liverpool for two years Babel has realized it’s either put up or shut up time. It’s heartwarming when a young man can look himself in the mirror and realize he’s crap.

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